In his doctoral thesis, “Gendered Consciousness as Watershed of Masculinity: Men’s Journey with Manhood in Lesotho”, Dr Tlali Phohlo explores the operations of Sesotho masculinity, its dominant ideas and practices as well as its effects on Basotho women.
The thesis also explores men’s resistance to the gender-ethical consciousness gaining momentum in Lesotho.
This gender-ethical consciousness challenges men to engage in a reflection of their participation in a culture and practices which oppress women and children.
This gender-ethical consciousness concept, in my opinion, is noble but must not be misused by women as a means of opening the flood-gates of abuse towards men under the guise of gender equality. It must not only challenge men, but the same should apply to women as well.
Historically, the root of violence against women and girls has been attributed to gender inequality.
This disparity, as Dr Phohlo puts it, emanates from a deep-running belief among the Basotho that being born male necessarily implies a superior social position and status that is naturally and divinely sanctioned.
Simone de Beauvoir, an existentialist philosopher and feminist, in her book The Second Sex argues that “man is the one, (while) woman (is) the other”.
This, she argues, is because a man can think for himself without a woman, while a woman cannot think of herself without a man. According to this school of thought, therefore, a woman is a non-essential creature because men are defined and differentiated with other males and not with a female.
A male is not defined in reference to a woman because he is the “essential, the absolute, the one”. She is simply the other.
Sadly, some women are happy in their role or at least not disconcerted in giving up the positive aspects of being “the other”.
Masculinity and the outlook on gender roles are socially constructed through historical and cultural processes and practices.
It is in such processes and practices that men have, and continue to be advantaged over women. However, this state of affairs is rapidly changing in our society.
In light of these developments, studies on gender equality and empowering women have been conducted by various scholars, governments and international organisations like the United Nations Entity for Gender Equality and the Empowerment of women.
Measures have, resultantly, been taken to curb violence against women and girls by ensuring that human rights and fundamental freedoms for women and girls are respected, protected and fulfilled through legal frameworks.
This has been achieved by improving girls’ access to quality and safe education, increasing women’s access to, and control over economic resources as well as addressing the socio-cultural norms and attitudes.
There are, indeed, notable positive changes in these areas in our society, evidenced by the increased safeguards for women from violence which have increased the likelihood of them living an abuse-free life.
Gender-ethical consciousness puts more emphasis on men changing their bad habits, but says little about women changing their perspective on empowerment.
To some women, empowerment seems to mean not only equal rights but also a sex-war and separatism.
Does this mean men are not prone to be victims of violence and gender inequality?
To answer in the affirmative would be disingenuous.
In this post-modern period, men can also be victims of abuse.
I have in mind the recent case of American rapper Jay Z who was assaulted by his sister-in law Solange Knowles (sister of super star Beyoncé).
The internet is awash with jokes over the incident. However, imagine for a minute if the roles were reversed and it was Jay Z beating up Solange.
Would it still be funny? Certainly not!
Feminists would be writing petitions to radio stations to stop playing Jay Z’s songs and everyone would be in solidarity with Solange, as the Chris Brown-Rihanna case attests.
There would be a global campaign baying for Jay Z’s blood, and the abuse of women would be the buzz word in the mainstream media. However, when a man is assaulted, it is merely a joke.
In tandem with protecting women, we must also create a society that is sensitive to the abuse of men.
The Jay Z incident highlights the drawbacks of the post-modern society we are living in where the abuse of men elicits laughter, implying that it is alright for men to be bashed by women.
When women abuse men, we find all kinds of explanations and justifications in a bid to exonerate them.
But when men are in the wrong, there is an immediate outcry that demonises and criminalises them.
Abuse is abuse whether perpetrated by men or women. Condemnation must not be selective. Society must stand as much for men as it does for women.
Therefore, to add to what Dr Phohlo said, I invite not only men but also women to engage in a reflection on their participation in practices which oppress the other.
– Moeketsi is a sub-editor at the Lesotho Times and Sunday Express.
