The nyatsi has fallen from favour

So, that sham of a marriage between the All Basotho Convention (ABC) and the Lesotho Workers Party (LWP) is finally over.

ABC, which seems to have been the husband, filed divorce papers on LWP (the obvious wife) last week.

Insiders tell me the couple had been sleeping in separate beds many moons before the divorce.

They have been throwing pots and pans at each other for months. 

Scrutator was not surprised.

That marriage was scandalous from the start because it was based on convenience rather than principle and ideology.

They married because they wanted those free seats in parliament.

The problem however was that the ABC had always treated the LWP like a nyatsi rather than an official wife.

And like all nyatsis, there comes a time when their sweetness runs out and they have to be dumped. 

The ABC has done just that. 

But there is something more curious about the whole affair: Tom Thabane says the alliance is over but the relationship is still solid because they will still work with the LWP in parliament.

That’s like saying the marriage is over but we can still “know” each other (check your Bible to understand what it means to “know” someone).

It would be enough, if conjugal privileges were the only thing that the ABC still wants to enjoy from its ex-wife.

But it wants more than just that. Thabane says the ABC will now court workers’ unions.

Now that’s worse.

It’s like divorcing your wife to marry her mother.

Remember the LWP was born out of the labour movement and the unions.

The labour movement is the LWP’s mother.

How uncouth and lustful can an ex-husband be? The ABC clearly wants to be the bull in the kraal that sleeps with the whole herd.

What brand of aphrodisiac have they been imbibing? 

Scrutator hopes whatever brand it is it does not start with a “V”.

On a serious note, Scrutator thinks the obsession with petty politics has become the bane of our politics.

Everyone wants to be a leader. Everyone wants to own a political party.

Little wonder, then, that we have zillions of political parties in a country whose population is not even two million. 

If you were to send two Basotho to the moon and visited them the next day do not get surprised to find that they would have formed three political parties!

The United States with a staggering population of over 300 million only has two major political parties.

Like the Democratic People’s Republic of Korea, all of Lesotho’s parties claim to be democratic.

Most of them were borne from bitter and acrimonious splits.

It’s sad that when they split they insist on continuing in their ways of mediocrity.

Take the LWP/ABC split for instance.

Instead of dealing with the divorce in a sober and professional manner the public relations office at the ABC decides to treat all of us like fools.

Thabane says they split was necessary to comply with Sir Ketumile Masire’s recommendations.

What hogwash!Does that party have thinkers?

Or do they think we are all dimwits who can be hoodwinked with such hokum?

That was not all.

We hear Thabane’s bodyguards then descended on the under-fed party youths like a tonne of bricks last Sunday in Mazenod.

The youths were beaten to a pulp and are still nursing their wounds as we speak.

Their crime?

They had dared raise a finger in protest over the split with the LWP.

Now is this the version of democracy that Thabane has been preaching since he quit the ruling Lesotho Congress for Democracy?

Such demagogues are a threat to democracy and the rule of law, and are better kept away from State House.

When Scrutator mentioned last week that scribes from that dungeon of a newsroom were high on hopose or qhoma-u-cheche she got some nasty responses in her inbox.

She was accused of being many things, including being a foreigner.

But just as Scrutator was about to withdraw her stinging remarks about the scribes more evidence that they are indeed high on something came rolling in.

Scrutator was enjoying their last week’s comment on the fight over wages in the textile industry until the editorial took a curious twist towards the end.

Out of the blue, the writer started talking about political bickering having “taken centre- stage” in a place called “Qualing” constituency. Where is Qualing in Lesotho? Who is the MP of that constituency?

Achee! And to think they say Scrutator, the proud daughter of Qacha’s Nek, is a foreigner.

Scrutator believes the editor should launch a witch-hunt to find out who inserted that bit about Qualing and the two paragraphs that followed.

 Scrutator had the pleasure of attending one popular beauty pageant on Saturday.

Although there were some delays and hic-ups, the show was going well until question time came.

“What would you do if you win the prize car?” fired one judge.

“I would drive it to Cape Town,” came the response from one contestant who clearly had the beauty but had no brains.

“How would you preserve the Basotho culture from the corrosion of globalisation?”

Ackhasorhvpoiergjhqluihwkjgnkeqjgr hijybl3eqkgmklojheigrhj,” said the contestant.

Another question: “What would you do to save money if you were the minister of finance now that the government is broke?” 

I-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ii,” responded one stunning girl.

Those girls were so scared and dull that they couldn’t even spell their names under pressure.

Watching those girls fumble, Scrutator wanted to cry.

It was such a sad sight to watch.

So what did Scrutator enjoy at the show?

Well, nothing but Phoka Special.

Viva famo! Viva!

Down with the silly hip-hop wannabes who irritated my ears!

Down with those pathetic pretenders!

Down with that Mafikizolo boy who pretended to be singing while hurting Scrutator’s ears. And those sexually suggestive dance moves?  Unoriginal.

Big Nuz were a big flop.  They looked tired and uninspiring.

The things we see in this life.

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