The brew is damn good bro!

WHAT brew are they imbibing at that dungeon of a newsroom?

Is it the illicit hopose or qhoma-u-cheche from Upper Thamae?

Whatever it is, Scrutator had never seen such “inebriated” headlines in that other weekly.

If whoever coined those headlines last week was not under the influence, then the tabloid is certainly taking the competition too far.

It’s understandable that when a newspaper is battered by rivals left, right and centre — in terms of real and properly written news stories — it can resort to anything to remain a little relevant on the market.

But to claim “NUL faces closure” in a headline and then fail to back it up in the actual story is plumbing the depths of despair to say the least.

In short, such alarmist creativity is normally the work of media demagogues bereft of ideas.

So embroidered is the story that even the editor, if there is one, was too embarrassed to attach a byline to the scoop.

Scrutator would have forgiven the tabloid for the outrageous embellishment had the lazy subs there not splashed another alarmist headline.

“18 000 die of Aids.”

When?

In 2007.

But then, even the story itself was such a hodgepodge only someone high on kipa se ntekane — from Upper Thamae — could do that.

First it talks about the passport crisis before quickly mentioning Millennium Development Goals.

“The suspension of temporary travel permits by South African immigration authorities, and the backlog of Lesotho passports, could seriously compromise Lesotho’s efforts to eradicate extreme poverty by 2015, the first target of the United Nations Millennium Development Goals,” gushes the intro.

Next it ropes in opposition politician Libe Moremoholo, that know-it-all motormouth, to say some gibberish about the “government’s poor service delivery”.

Ntsau Lekhetho, thank you for the “winter warmer”.

Yes, I cried until I started sweating like we were in sweltering summer.

The bit about 18 000 dying of Aids only pops up in the sixth paragraph – or is it?

And nothing about the Aids calamity is ever mentioned again in the story.

At least someone at that paper was sober enough to hide the editorial in Siberia pages.

Still don’t get the point?

Here’s a bit from the comment: “Specific crises within the subsystems of the state can also exist — for instance, an economic crisis, a public health crisis like HIV/Aids, a public order crisis, or a constitutional crisis — with each on its own not amounting to a generalised condition of a crisis state although a subsystem crisis can be sufficiently severe and/or protracted that it gives rise to the generalised condition of a crisis state.”

Let’s keep the brew from Upper Thamae flowing!

Scrutator has never had a doubt that our football is home to some of Lesotho’s unwashed.

But never did she dream that one day such stakeholders would expose their uncouthness in front of foreign visitors.

I am told the ruffians, the unwashed and the dimwits in our football were at it during an administration workshop facilitated by the English Football Association (FA) that ended on Monday.

Scrutator did not attend the workshop but hears that havoc nearly erupted when FA official Paul Mullen did not dole out free T-shirts as expected.

The riff-raff that attended the workshop wanted T-shirts to match with the bags, pens, notepads and certificates that the FA had already dished out.

Some even accosted Mullen accusing him of stashing the T-shirts, Scrutator was told.

Others told him they had heard that the FA had delivered zillions of T-shirts to Lesotho a month before the workshop.

In the end Mullen decided to address the matter to avoid mayhem.

“We don’t have any more gifts for you,” Mullen announced to the participants who seemed shocked that a white man could organise a workshop without free T-shirts.

“You have bags and certificates and hopefully that will be enough to help you develop football back in your communities.

“So stop asking me . . . about more gifts you think you are entitled to.”

With stakeholders like these who needs Likuena to embarrass the country!

God looked at my work and he was very pleased.

Then he looked at my pay slip, and he wept!

I hope this is no blasphemy.

The truth of the matter, however, is that my heart bleeds for my colleagues working in the textile factories in Lesotho.

They work many hours for peanuts.

And when they raise a finger to complain they are kicked out like dogs.

Those that say slavery has been abolished should visit the textile firms in Lesotho.

There, workers are worked until their backs crack.

The little pay they get at the end of the month is meant to give their bodies just enough nourishment so they don’t collapse at work.

It was therefore a shock and a great disappointment when I heard that one of the trade union leaders was now in bed with the employer.

It was Daniel Maraisane, the secretary-general of the Lesotho Clothing and Allied Workers Union (Lecawu), who brewed a shocker by suggesting that workers should only get a M53 wage increment when new wages are announced in October.

First I laughed.

Then I cried.

Maraisane, a fellow who looks well-fed with those rotund cheeks, is pleading on behalf of the employers.

He has taken it upon himself to insulate employers from high wage demands from workers.

Maraisane is even angry that Billy Macaefa, the secretary-general of the rival Factory Workers Union (Fawu), is demanding an increment of M537 plus allowances.

He says Billy’s demands are a dream.

My foot!

Since when have trade unionists sided with the employer?

Since when has it become the role of union leaders to get angry on behalf of employers?

Karl Marx and Frederick Engels must surely be turning in their graves.

Clearly Maraisane has gone beyond just jumping into “bed” with the Taiwanese.

Has he been “spoken for”?

Shall we get ready to pop the champagne and catch the bouquet?

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