STEAMING IT OFF
DON’T you just hate that feeling of being the odd one out?
Always feeling awkward no matter how everyone else — especially those on the outside — think you “fit in”?
It is not a great space to be in and mostly it is just caused by something(s) going on and on in your head.
It persists no matter how old or new friends have accepted you and tried to make you feel as comfortable as possible.
It is a really “sucky” feeling believe me.
This state varies in intensity, impact and consequences as it is fuelled by so many different events or circumstances.
Sometimes it can go unnoticed and occasionally it puts you in a worse position, making you more self-conscious and even embarrassed.
For instance, I am a very awkward person by nature and that makes me self-conscious to boot.
I say awkward though it more inclines to clumsy.
Check this out: my clothes do not fit very well — somehow I always have a problem of some sort with a piece of clothing at any given moment.
It is either one garment is just too tight, making sitting and sometimes just breathing an experience and a half.
Or they are too loose they hang the wrong way and “sit” on my body in a way that makes me look like I have some appendages I was not born with.
I know you will ask why I do not buy my size, but I will reply: when I bought it, it fit, but now it has taken the awkward shape of my body and has vowed to embarrass me at every occasion.
Some people feel awkward in crowds.
Next time when you are at a party, or some sort of social gathering, look around, you will see them.
I know a girl whose name is Bonny.
She is beautiful, sassy, easy-going and even polite and she is popular anywhere and everywhere she goes.
But she was telling me recently that it is hard being her because, no matter how we think she is the “IT” girl, she always feels out of place in a crowd.
At a party, you will find her in two distinct places — right in the middle of the largest group of the hip and happening folk or way at the edges, alone, looking around like a lost little lamb.
Apparently, she finds herself in the crowd because she gets pulled in.
If life went according to her, she would stay in the shady corners for the rest of the shindig, basically for the rest of her life.
Bonny says she always feels out of place in that crowd, she feels like she does not belong among her so-called friends.
Maybe it is some sort of inferiority complex, because I asked a few of her friends what they think about her and all sang nothing but praises.
So I guess this awkwardness is the self-imposed one.
I forgot to ask her how she gets over this, but I have remembered she is mostly the worst drunk person by the end of the night.
Well, with her it is self-imposed but, really, I am sure you all know how it’s like to feel like a sore thumb any time anywhere.
Truth be told, I have felt like that numerous times while trudging this road called life.
Check this: you find yourself in a group of people and then suddenly it becomes bigger.
Everyone knows everyone and you are the only other person who keeps getting the “what is your name again?”
This becomes worse when you cannot understand the language and people keep roaring with laughter and you are left grinning like an idiot wishing you could be somewhere else.
These kinds of moments are abound and plenty.
Look back at the time your current squeeze introduced you to their ex or you bumped into your ex strolling with your current “one” and they both insist on holding some little inane chit-chat!
Man oh man!
Ever been caught making out?
Well, not by your parents because that is another mortifying story which we will get into one day!
I mean just someone walking in on you, then making their exit in that slo-mo movement.
How do you feel when you meet that person after that little incident?
Anyone who has been through this please hit me up.
Have you ever found yourself in that awkward situation of liking your current beau/chikita’s pal?
Not the “tolerate-like” — I am talking about the “your place or mine-like”.
How do you feel around that person?